Fun with Telemarketers

 Posted by at 14:52  Add comments
May 212009
 

I’ve been receiving the obnoxious car warranty scam calls for quite some time. I added the number they call from to my phone’s address book so I would know at once that it was them calling. I accepted the most recent two from them. The first time, I asked them to remove me from their list. The second time, which came the same day, I demanded that they remove me, lest I go to the “authorities.”  Later on, I read about how the FTC is investigating this very scam, so I felt pretty good about life.

Then, I started getting calls from the same number, but with a different pitch.  However, since it was the same number, I treated it as the same bunch.  Here’s how our first chat went.

“Hello?”  
“Hi, is this Ryan?”
“Who’s calling please?”
“My name is Anthony from Specialty Travel.  Our records indicate you bought an Orlando Disney vacation package a few years ago and never took the vacation.”
“Aren’t you people being investigated by the FTC?”
“Excuse me?”
“Aren’t you people being investigated for scamming by the FTC?”
“…THIS IS THE KGB!!!!” <click>

I relayed this story to my coworkers, who had overheard my end of the conversation, to much amused and astonished laughter. Today, they called me again! After exchanging some pleasantries, the following:

“How often do you get a chance to travel?”
“Oh, about every other week or so.”
“I mean travel outside of Boston.”
“Yeah, every other week or so. Cross-country.”
“Cross county? That’s gotta take more than a week. Do you fly?”
“Yep.”
“Man, that’s gotta do some great things for frequent flyer miles.”
“Ohhh yeah.”
“Well, I have an Orlando vacation package for you. How does that sound?”
“Well, to be honest, it sounds like a scam.”
“A scam? It’s not a scam.”
“Yeah, it is.”
“It’s not.”
“Come on. We both know it is.”
“Well, how do you feel about what Orlando did to Boston? Was that a scam?”
“Eh, I don’t really follow sports.”
“Yeah. Kicked the Celtics’ ass.”
“Say, are you guys still with the KGB?”
“The KGB?”
“Yeah.”
“Absolutely. <click>”

I’m honestly starting to enjoy it when these guys call. It’s entertaining, at the very least.

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